A hot humid day in August came and it was time for us to move all of my things to a tiny little dorm room at Oklahoma State University. Checking in was with all of the other families who were trying to move their kiddos in. Mom, Nana, Dad, and Zack all helped move me in to my dorm and it took ALL day to unpack, put together furniture, and make my dorm room home. When we finally got everything all moved in and in it’s place, it was time for my family and Zack to leave.I was scared to death. Scared to be alone. Scared for Zack and I’s relationship. Would it be able to withstand long distance? I was scared to miss out on important things at home. I was scared of the real world. I wanted my bed back, I wanted to walk in our back door to the smell of my house. I wanted to look outside and see my horses in the pasture, and more than anything I wanted to look out my window to see Zack’s 89′ maroon Chevy truck drive up my driveway. I immediately wanted to pack up, get my tuition back, and forget all about Stillwater, Oklahoma and my new life awaiting me. I knew nothing would ever be the same. For those of you who know me, you know I HATE change. I wanted to reverse time and go home.
Zack wrapped me in his arms when we walked outside to leave and I sobbed. I didn’t want to leave. I was so scared. Deep down I realized God had a plan but at the time I didn’t have the faith in our future long distance relationship like he wanted me to have. I needed faith-I needed the “everything happens for a reason” pep talk. That moment, Zack whispered in my ear “As long as you hold my hand, I will hold yours.” Yep, let more tears roll. But he was right. We could do this. I knew he loved me and I knew he was willing to make this work.
The rain poured on my first day of college as I trudged through puddles all the way to my comp class. Adjusting to the huge campus, million students, and everything else was going to be tough. I did not want to make new friends-I liked my old ones just fine. A few weeks passed and I had made the OSU Rodeo team. Then I made friends. I adore them still. I was so excited because Dad would be bringing my horse up to Stillwater to live with me. Things started to change for the better. Football season was here, my parents came to visit, I went home quite a bit, and Zack and I burned up the road A LOT between Prague and Stillwater. I missed that boy more than anything.
Winter came and the seriousness of our relationship grew. We spent Christmas with both of our families and it was like we never knew life without each other. Everything just fit. We were so in love. We had talked about marriage here and there. When we would like to get married. What we looked for in marriage, in a family, how we thought marriage worked. It was easy to talk about. Ever since I was little, I couldn’t wait to get married and have a family of my own. I never thought I would have that until I met Zack.
Each day I longed to just be around Zack more. I missed him when he wasn’t around and he was all I thought about. I began to think about marriage, about a family with him, what if we had kids someday? What everyday life would be like? Does he think about me like this too? So many questions but I knew that in God’s time and if it was his will, Zack would be my prince.
Spring came and we decided that we would go to Pleasanton, Texas where my Grand was living at the time and then go to Corpus Chrisit for Spring Break. One of the best trips I’d ever taken. We stayed at Grands, and he got to know her more. My Grand is one of the most Godly, humble, sweet, and beautiful people you will ever meet. I can only hope to be like her someday. Zack had a blast on our trip. We spent the week driving to different parts of Corpus, laying on the beach, swimming in the Ocean, shopping, and driving with the windows down in the jeep listening to music. It was a magical trip.With that week came more talk about our future. About getting married, when, and other things that came along with marriage.The end of the school year quickly came and I moved back home for the summer. Zack and I would continue to talk about marriage and plans we had for our future. We spent an amazing end to summer together with a trip to Mexico. ;)